Sakura Tears
by chenn
Summary: Life cannot be perfect forever. Kudo Shinichi faces the Black Organisation. How will he find out about the boss and protect Ran from the hands of the evil? Rated T for depressive scenes and a little bit of violence and romance. Too many genres so IDK what to put. R&R Please First part of the plot is referenced/translated.
1. Ambush

"I have a good news and a bad news." Haibara tugged on Conan's shirt. "I made a new antidote for APTX-4869. That's the good news. The bad one is that it has only 50% chance of survival. Here, take these. If you succeed, you can confess to Ran on the coming Valentine's Day." Haibara teased. "Thanks, Haibara." Conan said coolly. "Take care!" the brown haired girl waved as Conan strolled out of Professor Agasa's house.

Conan walked towards the Jimusho* and sighed as he thought about how he missed going to school with Ran and having her around as a friend. Or maybe slightly more than that, but he wasn't too sure of his own feelings. _No, I really like her. _He blushed. But he was too shy to tell her. _I will. I will tell her if I recover to my original size. _He thought. _I will come back for Ran. I won't make her wait anymore. For so many nights she sat by her bed crying. How I wish I could comfort her and tell her that I never actually left her side… But…what if the antidote didn't work? What if I won't come back forever? _His mind was a mess of surprise, happiness, excitement, worry, fear, longing and thousands of other feelings that he couldn't even describe. That was why he turned down Professor Agasa's offer to send him home. He really needed some time to cool down alone.

Suddenly, a gust of wind lifted his hair. As a detective for many years, his experience told him that something was not right. He pretended to smoothen down his hair and raised his hands near his ears, where he switched the thermal sensor on secretly. He gasped inside. Five men were ambushed behind bushes along the deserted alley. They had rifles all aimed at one direction. Conan was this close to walking into their aim, but they were not hurried to shoot him even though he was well within the shooting range and there was no one around. His heart began palpitating wildly. _Looking from the calmness and level of preparation, it is probably the Black Organisation's men. I cannot use any gadget before I know whether they know my identity. If they were aiming for me and they don't actually know my identity, they are probably trying to get me to tell them about Shinichi. A primary school kid is much easier to threaten than Ran, since both of us are on equally good terms with Shinichi. But if they do know who I am, then…they will ask for Sherry's whereabouts first. They will never let a betrayer go. Either way, I won't get shot here and now. _He walked slowly and calmly, but inside, he was shaking. If his identity was found out, Ran, Haibara, Heiji and all his close ties would be in danger.

Soon the distance narrowed as Conan took a deep breath before he paced towards the center of the circle formed by the five men.

Just then, his phone rang wildly.

In excitement, he scrambled for his phone in his pocket like a little kid. He pretend to check the called ID and picked up happily. A low male voice was heard on the other end of the phone. "HELLO MOMMY!" Conan burst into an innocent, childish greeting. Big sweat drops dripped from the forehead of the person on the other end, "Err...Kudo-" Before he could say anything, Conan continued, "I ONLY GOT 40 MARKS FOR MY MATH EXAM TODAY! SORRY, DON'T SCOLD ME!" He paused and whispered, "just say whatever you want, Hattori. Quick." Heiji sense a tone of fear in his ever-so-calm detective friend's voice. He spoke quickly, "This morning there was a major bank robbery at Osaka. All the bankers were killed with one single gunshot. Not a suspicious fingerprint, not a single bullet shell. More than 500 million Yen was robbed! There was a note at the counter saying-"

"I failed because I had a tummy ache that morning!" Conan interrupted. Heiji rolled his eyes and continued, "Saying 'Greetings to the great detective.' I thought it referred to me, since it happened in Osaka. But then, when the police walked under the sunlight, the name 'Professor James Moriarty'^ appeared. Moriarty, the archenemy of Sherlock Holmes. Apparently this referred to you. That was why I hurried over to Tokyo." Heiji quickly said.

Conan frowned. "This has to be the Organisation. Anyway, I am at the alley roughly 200m to the west of Mouri Tantei Jimusho. Get a pistol and come here alone, …dressed as Kudo Shinichi."

"WHAT?! WHAT KIND OF A JOKE IS THIS?" Heiji roared. "This isn't the first time. Only if you come, they might believe that I am not the real Shinichi. Then we can escape together." "Fine," Heiji sighed reluctantly, "Try to delay them and I'll arrive in 10 minutes." Just before he hung up the call, he heard Conan's sharp squeaky voice, "Okay, I promise I will do well in the next exam!" Heiji rolled his eyes again and smiled halfheartedly. He flagged down a taxi. "To Beika District."

Meanwhile, Conan had a 'Oh no, I failed my exam' look as he paced around, mumbling nonsense like "How am I going to tell Dad?" and "Dad will scold me…" Seconds passed, but it felt like decades. It was not long before Conan felt light shuffling within the bushes. The men lost their patience. "BAM!" the first bullet was fired. It whizzed past Conan's hair. He wasn't hurt. Conan sneered.

"FREEZE!" One of the men shouted. All of them jumped out and pointed the rifles at his chest. Ever so synchronized. Glancing at his watch, Conan read the time: 9:09pm. "Such a short time," he gritted his teeth and screamed like what little kids do. His face was a perfect expression of horror and shock. He almost cried, but his acting wasn't that perfect yet.

The leader of the group made his way towards Conan. He was emitting an eerie aura. "What…what do you want?" Conan squealed. The leader was stunned. If this little kid was Kudo Shinichi, he would have to capture him. Or else, he would face harsh punishments from the Boss. He waved his hand, signaling one of his accomplice to take the boy down. "Let me go!" Conan screamed. His childish accent is so natural now that he hangs out with Ayumi-chan and all the others. "Nice acting, Kudo-kun." the leader sniggled. "I'm…I'm…not Shinichi-niichan." Conan was on the brim of tears. He blinked his eyes to let the precious drop roll down his face. "Oh really?" the leader lifted Conan's chin with his icy cold rifle.

"Don't bully little children!" Heiji appeared from behind a tree. "I am Kudo Shinichi."

-To Be Continued- :D

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***The Mouri Tantei Jimusho is the place where Mouri Kogoro works.**

**^Moriarty was mentioned in the Movie 'The Phantom of Baker Street' :D**

**First DC fanfic, R&R and criticize please (: Thanks~ Actually I'm not really sure about the names of the characters because every version I watch/read is different OAO but I guess it doesn't really matter. The plot will be kinda complicated, so this story will probably get quite long. I'll update quite frequently unless I tell you otherwise, so please check back often ^_^**


	2. Emotions

The leader stared at Heiji in disbelief. He tilted his head and looked back at Conan, now crying like a baby. _Hey, Detectives won't cry like that, I must be wrong._ He didn't know that Conan tried so hard to cry like that. Suddenly, he tightened his grip on Conan's neck. "Kudo Shinichi, eh? If you want to save this little kid, you gotta use yourself to exchange for him!" Heiji smirked confidently and winked at Conan. The leader's reaction was a bit too late. A needle from Conan's watch pierced into his neck. Accompanied by four yelps, all the snipers fell to the ground as Heiji whipped out his silenced tranquilizer gun and shot all of them down. "Haha, spend the rest of your lives in jail!" Heiji laughed. "Phew, and that was close. I didn't know that you had such great acting skills, Kudo." Heiji peeked at Conan, whose face was still stained by teardrops. "How is that funny?" Conan looked at Heiji with his signature half-moon eyes.

"Hahaha, I can't even stop laughing!"

"You're nothing better than me. I don't even talk like that, your weird Tokyo accent."

"Hey, is that how you thank your saviour? If I didn't arrive on time, you're probably hostage now." Heiji wiped the thin cake of foundation on his face away.

"Saviour…" Conan rolled his eyes. "But Hattori, we have to be more serious now. I think the Organisation has already started their plans. We're all in danger. Especially Ran…" Conan lowered his head, his spectacles reflecting light from a nearby lamppost, effectively hiding his grim expression. _Ran, I'm so sorry. You'll have to wait alone again. But trust me that I'll be back soon. Then we can be together…_

Heiji put back on a serious face. "But what should we do now? Since "Shinichi" already appeared, the Organisation must be alerted and probably targeting him now. I can't disguise as you forever!"

"The antidote is almost ready," Conan grinned proudly. "I'll be back in no time. I'll protect Ran and fight in my own body."

"Really?" Heiji's eyes lit up with happiness for his best friend.

"Yup…" Conan looked up at Heiji with pure thankfulness. He received so much help from Heiji. Without Heiji, he couldn't possibly be so successful in solving all those cases. Heiji is not only a great partner, competitor, but also a true friend at heart. He always treats his friends' problems like his own, ever so helpful and righteous. Conan couldn't bear to tell Heiji the risk of the antidote. He didn't want Heiji to worry about him. He'd rather take it, all by himself…

"That's GREAT! I won't have to worry about calling you by the wrong name!" Heiji shook Conan's skinny shoulders with relief. A huge drop of sweat formed on Conan's forehead. So THAT was what you were worried about…

"Okay, then I'll stay with you before I turn back!" Conan smiled cheekily. "My house in Osaka?" Heiji groaned.

"Any problems?" Conan stared at Heiji.

"Uh… No! Haha, no problems!" Heiji laughed. "But what about Ran?"

"It's okay, I can fix that."

9pm, Mouri Tantei Jimusho

"Hello, this is Mouri Tantei Jimusho!"

"Hey Ran nee-san, I'm not going back to the tonight." the little Detective boy's voice came out of the speaker. Ran frowned, "Are you staying overnight to play at Professor's house…" "No, Ran nee-san, my mom came from America to fetch me. I'm going back. I called to say goodbye." Conan interrupted. "Oh…I see." A tone of sadness could be heard in Ran's voice. _Conan is really a great company. He was always there for me when Shinichi wasn't around. Now that he is leaving…I'm all alone again. No one to talk to when I'm sad, no one to share my happiness with when I'm happy. Sonoko is a great friend, but no one can replace Conan or Shinichi…_

"Ran nee-san? Are you there?" Conan's voice interrupted Ran's thoughts. "Ah, yes. When is your flight? Do you want me to send you to the airport?" "Tonight. It's okay, just take care of yourself!" "Then…call me when you reach there! Take care!" Ran spoke with faked excitement. "Bye, Ran nee-san!" "Bye…" Conan hung up before Ran could say anything else. She put the phone back slowly and leaned against the window, staring out at the dark night sky. _It seems really foggy today, but perhaps it's just because I'm lonely. Conan is just a primary school kid, but why, why does he remind me so strongly of Shinichi? Why does his leaving make me feel like I've lost something really important in my life?_

"You are so strong, Ran" Sonoko once said. _Strong?_ Ran chuckled. She was always smiling and laughing, but who sees her tears and suffering? Who understands the loneliness in her eyes when she thought of Shinichi? Who feels her sadness when she gives her Valentines' Day chocolate to her father? In the darkest nights, when memories of the past flow back, she is choked by the happiness and it makes her even lonelier when she wakes up.

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**Next chapter will probably be less emotions and more plot development stuff.**

**Spoiler: the Black Organization appears! :D**

**Thanks for the support, everyone! Please continue to review. That's my motivation to write! Thanks! :)**


	3. Change

**Oops, sorry. There wasn't any Black Organization yet. Gomenasai! _ Estimation error haha. Anyway my logic isn't that great recently so if there are any parts that aren't logical please tell me! Thanks!**

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9:30pm, Heiji's house, Osaka

"Kudo, what are you thinking about?" Heiji asked as he pressed a can of Cola against Conan's cheeks. Conan opened it and sipped while lying back against the warm, cozy sofa, "um, nothing."

"Don't worry, Kudo. Those guys aren't that smart to investigate the police HQ of Osaka. I promise that you're safe!" Heiji said confidently. "Moreover, I turned back into Hattori Heiji, so that fake Kudo Shinichi has already disappeared. They're probably looking for you all over Tokyo!"

"Hmm, true. But we shouldn't be too…"

"Yup. Just relax and everything should be all right for now. And how will you reward me for running all over Japan in the middle of the night, saving you and bringing you home?"

"Tsk. I'm going to sleep now. See you tomorrow." Conan turned and walked straight into the guest room.

The moon shone on the ground, making the atmosphere so sad and mystical. Conan sat by the bed, looking into the sky. His mind was blank, his heart overwhelmed by the sense of imminent danger in the air.

Heiji stared at the closed door and sighed. _How much burden did you carry by yourself? You really don't need to take it alone, Kudo…_

The next day, Tokyo

_The weather today is really good._ Thought Ran as she headed for school, her bag slung over one shoulder. She took a deep breath, feeling all her sorrow being blown out and swept away in the cool, fresh spring breeze. A new day, a new beginning, thousands of new opportunities. Opportunities. Is that what motivates her to move on when Shinichi isn't around?

She looked up at the rows of sakura trees, pale green and budding with spots of light pink. _Shinichi, will you come back to find me during the sakura season? Then we can sit under the trees and look at the sakura, just like before…_

Heiji's house

Conan gazed out of the window at the budding sakura trees bathed in the golden sunrays. _Ran, do you remember the days we went to see the sakura flowers? You stood under the tree, smiling; your beauty made the prettiest flower lose its colour. I regret not treasuring those peaceful, happy days. Now, a peaceful day is what I would pay anything for. It's happiness that I see as a real luxury._

He picked up his handphone.

"Hello?" a familiar voice was heard on the other end.

"Hello Ran nee-san, I'm in America now. Everything is great, so don't worry."

"Ah, Conan-kun. Be happy there and keep in touch!"

"Sure, I will."

"Then, bye!"

"Bye, Ran nee-san!" _I really hope this is the last time 'Conan' talks to you._

For the rest of the month, Conan stays at Heiji's house, investigating the Black Organization and discussing it with Heiji over dinner, when he returns from school. Days passed and there was not much information gathered, so Conan just studied, listened to music, admired the scenery, watched the news. Often, Kazuha comes over to visit Heiji and they would quarrel in the living room while Conan went into hiding. As he listens to Heiji and Kazuha shouting "Ahou!" and "Baka!" to each other, he began to think about Ran and how they used to do that too. This seems so familiar yet strange. Those memories filled him up, making him contented each day.

For as long as he could remember, he believed that people should always help one another, even if feelings like hatred or jealousy exists among them, even if there is not a single reason for helping. But now, he realised that the amount of sacrifice one puts in is beyond what he could take. Despite that, he has to protect Ran, to protect all those he loved. He has to protect all of them with his seven-year-old body. Then, he needs to fight the Black Organization. He cannot lose this battle. He must not. Because there is nothing left behind if he lost.

"Kudo, I'm back." Heiji's voice interrupted his trail of thoughts.

"Oh, how was it?" Conan stared out of the window without turning back.

"Nothing from the Black Organisation, but I got a call from Haibara."

"The antidote is complete?" Conan spun back, his voice tingling with a silver of excitement.

"Yeah, but…" Heiji sighed.

"But what?" Conan couldn't control his excitement.

"50% chance of survival. Why didn't you tell me that?" Heiji stared at Conan.

"I…I…I didn't want you to worry about me." Conan lowered his head like a little boy who just made a mistake.

Heiji pushed his cap up, "Remember, I am always your friend. Forever. You don't have to hide anything from me." His voice so serious, unlike the usual casual and playful tone he had.

"Thanks." A simple word, full of so much appreciation and trust. Conan turned back. He didn't want Heiji to see his moist eyes.

"Let's get back to Haibara quickly! Argh, we'll have to take the train again. How troublesome!" Heiji was back to his loud, obnoxious self, as if nothing happened at all.

Conan smiled. _I'll never find another friend like you, Hattori._

(A/N: Not yaoi! _ just pure friendship ^^)

Tokyo, Professor Agasa's house

Conan, Heiji, Prof. Agasa, Haibara. Four people, eight eyes, all staring at the red and white pill lying in a glass bottle on the table. The late afternoon sun reflected off the glass bottle, blinding their eyes. All of Conan's life condensed into that one pill. After an awkward silence, Heiji spoke, "Kudo, are you sure you'll take this? It's only 50% chance…"

"Stop saying that, Hattori. I know very well what my consequences are. The worst situation is death, but I have no way back now. I'll just have to try. Before that, promise me one thing."

"What is it?"

"If I really…couldn't make it, you will tell Ran that I died in a car accident. Tell her not to wait anymore and move on. She's really strong, she will forget me." He spoke so calmly, as if telling the story of a stranger.

"Tell her that you aren't around anymore? What are you thinking about? Don't you know how sad she would be?"

"I know. I've already thought of it. If you say that I went to America or something, she'll just waste her precious youth waiting for someone who will never return. I don't want her to destroy herself waiting for me. So, promise me?" Conan's eyes sparkled with tears. He is waiting for a reply.

_That's the best thing for Ran, isn't it? No more lies, no more promises. Ran can live her own life._ Heiji turned around, afraid to look at Conan's eyes. "Okay, I promise you!" A sudden light tone used to cover the deepest emotions. The atmosphere became heavier.

"Why so serious, Great Detective? No faith in my work, huh?" Haibara joked. She was surprised by her own sentence. Shouldn't she be looking at all these calmly? Shouldn't she be cold towards everyone, no exceptions? Her appearance ever cool and untouched, but inside, she began to feel a special emotion for this boy - Edogawa Conan- like an iceberg starting to melt.

She knew so long ago that there was not going to be anything between them. Their relationship was beyond friends, but not lovers. More like partners or confidants. _Yeah, confidants._ She thought. _But that's more than enough for me._

That is why she put so much effort into making the antidote despite her selfish thought of not letting Conan turn back into Shinichi, not letting him leave to stay with that angel.

Conan smiled at Haibara appreciatively. _This girl never shows her emotions unless we're taking about the Organisation. Yet she is always there to give me the best support and advice._

_Okay._ Conan thought. _I'm ready for the pill. There are only two consequences: I live, or I die._ The red and white pill was shaking vigorously in Conan's palm. _Not that I'm scared, but if I die I'll lose Ran forever._ He swallowed the pill.

Waves of excruciating pain and nausea hit him continuously, making him collapse to the ground. He felt as if his muscles were torn, his bones dislocated. His body was like a giant jigsaw puzzle being reconstructed again. He gritted his teeth in agony. Heiji quickly put him onto a bed with all the necessary medical equipment ready nearby.

His vision began to blur, but one image became more vivid.

It was a girl, his angel.

_"Shinichi, when are you coming back?"_

_"Shin…Shinichi! Where did you go? I thought you met an accident, I was so worried!"_

He remembered the way she used to worry for him.

_"Shinichi is so overconfident and dense and he loves to crack cases too much. But when danger comes, he becomes so trustworthy and brave! I love him so much. Don't tell him this secret!"_

_"Shinichi…I love you…"_

_That's what she said to Conan and herself when she misses him._

_And there's way more, like when she saves Conan with her karate; when she laughs at him for being into detective works…_

"Ran…!" Conan struggles as he tugged on the bedsheets.

Haibara stared at the various readings of Conan's breathing, blood pressure, heartbeat and body temperature. _Everything is normal._ But she frowned upon seeing another set of data.

Observing her, Heiji quickly but cautiously asked, "What's wrong?"

"He won't die, but the situation's not really positive either, because he took the temporary antidote many times and his body produced a resistant. I've already made the dosage in that pill stronger so that the change is one-off. According to his muscle and bone density now, he probably has some sequela.

"Memory loss?" Heiji panicked.

"No, no, not memory loss. Probably just spasms of skeletal contraction, but I'm not sure of the duration, length and intensity of each contraction." Haibara continued staring at Shinichi's pale face as she deliberately made her voice monotone and emotionless. _At least he turned back into Shinichi._ She sighed.

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**How was it? I had a hard time writing the Haibara part haha.**

**Next chapter: Shinichi and Ran meets! Haha. This time I won't estimate wrongly again (:**


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